“When you fall for someone’s personality, 
everything about them becomes beautiful.”

The Gottman Institute has found that the average couple waits about seven years before seeking marriage counseling. This means they have been living in pain for seven years. The Gottman Institute has done a great job of simplifying communication in a relationship. Marriage doesn’t have to be difficult. Here are four tips to help improve happiness in your relationship:

  1. Give yourself a break. Men are more likely than women to do this. If you make a mistake in your relationship, apolagize for it and don’t beat yourself up. This will only make you feel worse.
  2. Go ahead, argue. As human beings, we don’t get along all the time. It’s alright to have a different perspective than your partner. Just share it, respectfully. Sometimes, you just need to agree to disagree.
  3. Let go of the past. I don’t know of anyone that likes the past to be thrown in their face. Learn to forgive. This will give you a new appreciation for your partner. 
  4. Learn to listen. I know this sounds obvious, but listening is an art. I had to get my Master’s degree to really learn how. You don’t have to solve your partner’s problems, you just need to listen to them. This will help create safety in the relationship and your partner will feel like you have their back.
After seeing couples for almost twelve years in my practice and taking many trainings in using The Gottman Method for couples. I have learned that it’s never too late to help or even save your marriage. We go through seasons in life and in our relationship. Stop thinking it has to be perfect and learn to accept one another. For more help, please call me at (650) 892-0357 for a consultation.

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