Valentine’s Day is almost here. Unfortunately, a lot of people think it is a Hallmark Holiday. We, at The Gottman Institute know that’s not true. This is a chance for you to celebrate love. Make it special and plan a date with your partner. Be adventurous, this will add to your emotional bank account. It’s actually like buying stock. This is also a good time to strengthen your Love Maps. Here are a few questions to help:
  1. Name two of your partner’s closest friends.
  2. What was your partner wearing when you first met?
  3. What was one of your partner’s best childhood experiences?
  4. What is your partner’s largest source of stress?
  5. Name two of the people your partner admires the most.
Make sure you spend quality time together. Take a genuine interest in what your partner has to say. You can go to and order the Love Map cards. There are also apps. for your Smart phone.
How is your Love Ratio in your Relationship? Have you ever noticed that sometimes you get upset over the smallest things in your relationship? Maybe, your love ratio was off. The research at The Gottman Institute has shown that happy couples have a 5 to 1 ratio. This is 5 positive experiences to every 1 negative experience. This doesn’t mean you keep score or immediately compliment your partner five times after an argument. This means you have more positive interactions than negative ones. When your love ratio is in balance, you don’t get upset over the little things. Make being positive a habit and you will really see it pay off in your relationship.
We wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day. For more help in your relationship, please call me at (650) 892-0357. I have taken all three of The Gottman Trainings for Couples and I am working towards becoming a Gottman Certified Therapist.

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