Is he the one? That’s the burning question. You’ve been hurt in the past, and you wonder if you can now pick a good one. You need to realize you have grown since your last relationship. You are more insightful. That is really a good thing.

It's actually a good thing that you are questioning the relationship. This means you take it seriously. I know you want this one to last. So, how will you know when you should take the next steps. Whether you want to move in together, or just go for it and walk down the aisle. Here are some helpful tips, when making that big decision.

7 Signs He’s the One For You:

  1. His actions speak louder than his words. It’s true, words need to be backed by action. If they aren’t, then it’s not sincere. When he apologizes, he doesn’t do the same thing again. You know he loves you because he says it. But, you also know it because he shows it. He remembers your anniversary. Not just when you officially started dating, but when you first met at your friends party. He’s willing to accept your brother’s quirks, because he knows this mean he gets to be with you. He’s willing to help you out with your car insurance payment and not throw it in your face. He’s doesn’t…

Read more: 7 Signs He's The One For You

There is a ton of information out there on how anxiety impacts you physically and emotionally. But, what about how it impacts your relationship? Have you thought about how it impacts the people around you?

When you have anxiety you feel overwhelmed, and can have periods of panic. It may feel like you have them for no reason. This can leave you feeling confused. The first step is recognizing you have anxiety, and then letting your partner know.

I have seen many couples over the years. Whenever one person in the relationship has an anxiety disorder, it must be treated. If it is not treated, nothing in the relationship will change. And, it could even get worse.

Here are 5 major relationship problems due to anxiety:

  1. Anxiety crushes your true voice. When you have anxiety, it may be difficult to ask for your true needs. You may also feel like you have to talk about something or do something immediately. In order to get over the anxiety. This can come across as too pushy, and overwhelm your partner. This is also known as catastrophic thinking. You need to stop and gather the facts. It’s alright to take a break and talk about it later.
  2. Anxiety causes you to behave selfishly. Your worries and fears, cause you to focus too much on yourself. They are also causing you…

Read more: The 5 Major Relationship Problems Due To Anxiety & How To Fix Them

You are told that money will make you happy. Maybe, you didn’t have much money growing up, or maybe you had everything. Whatever the case, you need to define your relationship with money and not let it control you.

We live in a country that puts a high value on money. This can leave you feeling like you don’t have enough. You really can’t buy love. Money cannot replace the time you spend with your loved ones. It also can’t take back the past or predict the future.

The truth of the matter, is you need money to survive in this country. It will put a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food on the table. This is something everybody needs. So, why is money the root of all evils? For many, money is power and status. You really need to be careful here. If you idolize people with money, you will not see them for who they really are.

Here are 6 reasons money is causing problems in your relationship:

  1. You have different financial priorities. You both need to be responsible with money. One person shouldn’t always have to monitor the other’s spending. You need to talk about your financial priorities. If one person wants to save for a trip to Spain, while the other drops $500 on a night out with friends. Then,…

Read more: 6 Reasons Money Causes Relationship Problems

Wouldn’t that be nice, a relationship without problems. That really is a dream. We all go into a relationship with our own set of problems. We learn to be in a relationship through our own family of origin. Which is different for everyone. Then, you try to mesh the two together.

That isn’t always easy. Which, if you have been in a relationship for a while you’ve probably figured out. So, the answer is no there is not a relationship that doesn’t have problems. The Gottman’s research has found, what’s important is that you repair. This means you accept one another’s differences and you learn to make up after an argument.

After working with many couples over the years in my practice, I have learned to appreciate the importance of perpetual problems. A perpetual problems is a problem that keeps coming up in your relationship that you just can’t solve, or come to a compromise that works for both of you.

5 benefits of perpetual problems:

  1. Make-up sex. What nobody tells you about sex, is that it is much more enjoyable when you talk about it. This is another area that our culture leads us to believe, that it will automatically be great. You each have your own body and it can take time to get to know one another sexually. Your likes and dislikes may differ. Maybe your…

Read more: Is There Such A Thing As A Relationship Without Problems?

We live in a time where going to see a counselor, is not that uncommon. Thank God, it’s hard to believe there was a time where it was considered taboo. I am grateful for all the counselors before me, that fought to make it alright.

Counseling can help get you through the bumps in life, especially in your relationship. But, like everything with good comes the bad. So many people want to see a counselor for everything. For example, ‘I am so worried he will not like me if he finds out about my past.’ When he already likes you and he knows about your past.

What will happen if he doesn’t call me back?’ Does it mean I will never meet the man of my dreams and get married?’ The answer is, I don’t know, and that’s alright. You don’t have to have all the answers and dreams are always changing.

Here are 5 reasons you don’t need a counselor for your relationship challenges:

  1. This too shall pass. Every time you feel the road getting bumpy, say these four simple words. Repeat them over and over. If you have to, fake it till you make it. Remind yourself of the difficult times you have been able to get through. This may mean you need to change the lense. This will help you,…

Read more: What Are Relationship Challenges You Can Manage Without A Counselor?

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