Relationship Challenges

Relationship Challenges

Take better care of yourself, today. This will help you and your family.

Having too much stress, can negatively impact your life. Especially your relationship. When you feel overwhelmed, you may start to disconnect. When this happens your partner will begin to feel left out.

Your partner may also feel they have done something wrong. But, in reality you are feeling overwhelmed from the stress in your life. I see this happen a lot. Life takes over and you put everyone else first. If this goes on too long, you will begin to feel burnt out.

Take better care of yourself, today.

Self-care is taking care of your mind, body, and soul. Start by assessing your needs. Next, take action on that assessment. 

Here are 10 self care tips, that will help you in your relationship:

  1. Get organized to help your self care. This means organizing the space you live in. You want to be able to find your keys and wallet easily. You don't want to have a lot of clutter around. You will feel weighed down. When you bring new things in, clear old things out. This is good for your mind.

  2. Let a pet help you with your self care. Your pet will give you unconditional love. Make sure you spend quality time with your pet. Hug your pet and enjoy spending time with your pet. They have actually been known to help with the symptoms of…

Read more: 10 Ways To Take Better Care Of Yourself When You Are In A Relationship

Learn what some of the most common relationship problems are, and what you can do about them.

Relationship problems are a fact of life. After the honeymoon phase is over, problems begin. This doesn't mean you have to give up. Take a close look at your relationship. Where do you spend most of your time? Are you caught up with the children, or focusing on work?

What are common relationship problems?

One of the most common problems I see in my practice, is an inability to manage conflict. Dr. John Gottman is a premier researcher on relationships. It's not surprising that he found all couples have conflict. What's important is that you repair after the conflict and learn to manage the conflict. He found that 69% of problems in a relationship are unsolvable.

What does this mean? You need to understand the problem before you can solve it. There is nothing worse than feeling like your partner doesn't understand you. This is when you begin to feel emotionally isolated in the relationship. If you don't work on understanding, this can be the beginning to the end.

5 Common Relationship Problems You Can't Ignore:

  1. Negative Sentiment Override. This is when the negative overrides the positive. When couples are stuck in the negative sentiment override, they don't notice the positive 50% of the time. The negative sentiment override doesn't set in overnight. This can take years to set in. But, once it sets in it's not easy…

Read more: What Are Common Relationship Problems?

You can solve relationship problems without breaking up. Here are a few simple tips.

There are times where your relationship will feel stressful. You may feel overwhelmed. Not only do you have your relationship to manage, you have outside stressors as well to manage.

All relationships go through highs and lows. What's important is that you can manage the lows in your relationship. Keep in mind that relationships go through cycles. Once you get over one bump, there will be a time that you come upon another one.

You can solve relationship problems without breaking up.

The good news is that you can learn from your mistakes. These are called lessons

Here are 5 tips that can help you solve relationship problems without breaking up.

 

  1. Talk it out. When you start to have problems, it's easy to avoid talking about them. When I see a couple, I will have one partner be the speaker and one be the listener. It's not only important that you talk about your problems, it's important that you are listening. This means you don't have interruptions and you don't have your cell phone. This is how your partner will feel like you are listening. This let's your partner know that you care and that you have your partner's back. Start the conversation with what's going right in the relationship. Then, tell your partner what you appreciate about your partner. This needs to be genuine. This is…

Read more: How To Solve Relationship Problems Without Breaking Up

Don't let social media ruin a perfectly good relationship.

Who would of known that social media would of taken over like it has. I don't think it's going away anytime soon. This means you need to get used to it. I've always felt if you don't want people to know something about you, then don't post it on social media.

Does social media damage your relationship?

Sounds simple, but you know that is not always the case. I hear this a lot, someone posted something. You thought it was harmless, but then your partners feelings were hurt. If this keeps happening, it will drive a wedge in the relationship.

You also want to be careful about playing the comparison game on social media. People post their best side first on social media. You may feel like all of your friends and family on social media have an amazing life. That is not always the case. Just as you don't post what's going wrong in your life, neither do your friends and family.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think social media is a bad thing. But, you shouldn't take it too seriously. If you are playing the comparison game, you will never win. This will leave you feeling depleted and empty. 

Here are 6 things you don't want to post on social media while in a relationship:

  1. You don't want to overshare. A lot of people…

Read more: Learn How Social Media Damages Your Relationship

Your relationship will change. Learn how you can get through it.

Your relationship will change over time. There are many different reasons as to why your relationship will change. If you've been in a relationship for a while, then you know that the honeymoon phase will end.

The good news is, this is when you will begin to grow. Everyone has shortcomings. It's important to build a culture of understanding in your relationship. This will help build a long lasting relationship. 

Why do relationships change? There isn't a simple answer. 

As couples get closer to one another, their negative traits begin to stand out. Your relationship feels routine and is less exciting. When all of this happens your relationship begins to lose its luster. 

Why do relationships change? Here are 5 reasons why:

  1. Your partner's flaws will stand out. In the beginning, you couldn't see anything wrong with your partner. But, now you have been in a relationship for a while and you see your partner through a clear lens. You would like him to ask you more questions, or be more talkative. He doesn't always pick up his clothes, or help with the chores as much as you would like. And, there are many more things that stand out.
  2. The sex changes. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. When you are in a meaningful relationship, and you feel like your partner really gets you. The…

Read more: Why Do Relationships Change?

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Lianne Avila, MFT
1510 Fashion Island Blvd.
Suite 110
San Mateo, CA 94404

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(650) 892-0357

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