Lessons For Love Relationship Advice Blog

Learn how you can solve relationship problems without fighting. Start with understanding.

Even the best of relationships have problems. What's different is that couples learn how to repair after an argument. This means that you need to talk about it. I know this is not what everyone wants to hear. This is a great way to help build understanding in the relationship. "You must understand the problem before you can solve the problem." Gottman

Learn how to discuss relationship problems without fighting. 

The Gottman's research found that 69% of problems in a relationship aren't solvable. So, why don't you try to stop solving your relationship problems? Sounds simple, right? If you are in a relationship or have been in a relationship, then you know it's not always that simple. It starts with a conversation. This means one person is the speaker and one is the listener. You each get a turn at each role.

Here are 4 helpful tips on how to discuss relationship problems without fighting:

  • Work on understanding one another’s belief system. You didn’t just wake up one day and have your belief system. It started long ago in childhood. You learn your beliefs about relationships from your family of origin. How did your parents make decisions? Were you included in making decisions? The more you talk to one another about your belief system and where it came from, the more you will understand one another. This…

Read more: How To Discuss Relationship Problems Without Fighting

Are you suffering from the wintertime blues? Learn that you are not alone, and what you can do to feel better.

Wintertime blues are more common that you think. Especially, if you live in an area that can go for weeks or even months without sunlight. It could also be a sign of brain overload. Which means you are doing too much. When was the last time you stopped and did nothing. Yes, you heard me right. Did nothing? Stop and take a breath, try this for ten minutes.

If you don't learn to slow down, the wintertime blues will only get worse. This could lead to depression.

What can happen, is that you just keep going and going. You don't realize you are even getting the wintertime blues. This is also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). Many people suffer from SAD, this means you aren't alone. Unfortunately, not everybody talks about it. This leaves you feeling alone and isolated. Isolation is the worst thing you can do for depression. 

Talk to friends and family. If that doesn't help, then talk to a professional. You don't have to go through this alone. The good news is there is help. Stay away from stereotypes. Those are based on very old beliefs. You are not crazy, and you can get through this.

Here are 7 tips to help you fight the wintertime blues:

  1. Don't isolate yourself. When you are feeling depressed you may feel more irritable. This may…

Read more: 10 Tips To Help You Fight The Wintertime Blues

Are you tired of having money and relationship problems. Here are five tips that can help with that.

Talking about money in a relationship, can be stressful. But, you really need to talk about this one. I know, no one likes to hear let's talk about the budget. When you go into a relationship, you each come from a different family of origin. This means that you each have a different language. I have found that many couples have a different language (aka-belief system) about money.

That is why money and relationship problems go together.

After a while, you are going to have to talk about money. This can start when you are dating. This is not a problem that will go away if you ignore it, or don't talk about it. That will actually make it worse in the long run. Make sure that you are gentle with this conversation. Some people are more traditional and feel the man should pay for everything. Although, times are changing and many people are alright going dutch. Whatever, you choose make sure you are comfortable with the decision. Also, make sure this is a decision that you both feel good about.

At the beginning of a relationship, you are developing the foundation for how you handle money in your relationship. It's important that you both know what is coming in and what is going out. This means you need to start talking about money. You also…

Read more: The Uncomfortable Link Between Money And Relationship Problems

Learn what to do to take care of yourself, when your spouse is depressed.

How could this of happened? You have been married for a while, and you just got the news. Yes, your spouse is depressed. This is stressful on any relationship. How will you manage this? You still have to take care of the house and make lunches for the kids. Not to mention your own work. This doesn't leave a lot of room for yourself.

What to do to take care of yourself? Are you kidding me?

You are probably thinking that you can just forget about yourself. First of all, you need to know that you aren’t alone. More and more people are reporting that they are suffering from depression. Don’t try to hide this, make sure to talk to your friends and family, and seek out professional help.

There is hope, many people have been able to manage their depression and live a happy life. You will be able to get through this. But, it’s important that you don’t lose yourself in the process. That will only make you feel bitter and burnt out. You also won't feel like showing love to your partner.

Here are 9 tips to help you start taking care of yourself now:

  1. Set aside time for fun everyday. Even if you don’t know what it will be, just set aside time for it. Write down fun on the calendar, even when you think…

Read more: What To Do To Take Care Of Yourself When Your Spouse Is Depressed

Learn how to make deposits when your emotional bank account is empty.

Your Emotional Bank Account is empty! What, how did this happen? Does this mean that one more withdrawal could make it overdrawn, or worse yet close it? This can definitely happen after you have been in a relationship for a while.

Learn what to do when your emotional bank account is empty.

In the beginning you put your relationship first. But, now you have work, home and a family. This doesn’t leave much time for your relationship. What happened to date night? Can you remember the last time that you went out on a date with your partner? If the answer is no, then you are at risk of becoming overdrawn.

There are many ways to build back up your emotional bank account. It’s important that you start to prioritize your relationship, again. If you have been in a relationship for a while, then you know relationships are about giving and receiving.

Here are 10 ways to build your emotional bank account:

  1. Listen to your partner.

    This is one of the kindest things you can do for your partner. I have seen a lot of couples in my practice, and I hear this a lot, ‘I don’t feel heard.’ Set aside time each day to talk about your day with your partner. Make sure you both get a chance to speak.

  2. Touch your partner.

    Everyone…

Read more: What To Do When Your Emotional Bank Account Is Empty

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