Here is a list of seven things to give up in your life. If you give up on them, then your life will be a lot easier and you will be much happier. We hold on to so many things in life that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering. It's time to allow yourself to be stress free and happy. Starting today give up on all those things that no longer serve us and embrace change.
"Most couples have not had hundreds of arguments; they've had the same argument hundreds of times." Gay Hendricks
It's true, disagreements and even arguments are a normal part of being human. I mean really, if we all got along all the time, life could get boring. Couples are always asking me for help with communication. Most couples are stuck in attack and defend mode. I often train couples on how to listen to one another. Although, this may sound obvious when you are in the middle of an argument, it's not always obvious.
Couples are always telling me that they say the same thing over and over, but nothing changes. One thing I have found is that when you are in a relationship it needs to be equal. In a relationship there are two people and both people are valuable. The next time you find yourself in an argument with your partner stay away from saying:
Healthy relationships are based on friendship. Couples are always asking for help with communication, respect and intimacy. And, I always tell them to work on rebuilding the friendship. Studies show that a good friendship is essential in a relationship. When you have a good friendship the rest will follow. The following tips can help you create and maintain a healthy relationship:
Is it time for a cost-benefit analysis about your relationship?
One of the first questions I ask couples when they come in for counseling, is to do a cost-benefit analysis of their relationship. Most couples have never done this. A cost-benefit analysis can be as simple as What are the costs and benefits of staying together or breaking up. You can also take it a step further and ask these questions:
I hear this all the time in my practice. 'I don't want my child to only hear no.' And, I tell them their child doesn't always have to hear no. But, they do need your guidance and assurance. I also hear, 'I was always told no as a child and resented my parents for this.' And, I tell them your child won't grow up to resent you, in the long run they will respect you. I also hear, 'I just can't say no." And, as I have said in the past start to practice saying no, and it will become easier. As your child gets older here are the benefits they will learn from their parents saying no to them: